I just finished listening to a podcast from Brooke Castillo on Buffering. It’s #132 and titled Stop Buffering. All of Brooke’s podcasts give me something new to think about but this one really hit home. She explains buffering as using things, substances or activities to numb our feelings. Some people over drink, some over eat, some shop, some watch Netflix to zone out and not feel things. Basically we do something so we don’t feel anything negative. Buffering never solves the problem at hand and usually it makes it worse.
Why are we so scared to feel things? I am terrified of negative emotions. Years ago I had a boyfriend and it wasn’t a good situation and I was always scared I would wake up in the middle of the night and think about it so I would take sleeping pills to ensure I wouldn’t have to deal with those negative emotions at 3am. Looking back on it that seems so stupid – if a relationship is so bad that you need to drug yourself to sleep that is a major issue! But I was too scared to feel things.
Since my DUI, which you can read about here: Life Updates , I haven’t been drinking very much and i have had to deal with negative emotions. I’ve realized they won’t kill you! They will pass. I have learned so much about myself and what I really want. I am a big believer in the Law of Attraction and follow Abraham Hicks and know that you need to be able to feel your vibration and align that with what you want. If you are always drinking or eating to numb your feelings you are also dulling your vibration – this will never help you attract what you want using the Law of Attraction. You are going to make it so much harder instead of easier. I believe this is why I attracted my new Love while sober. I was finally a vibrational match for him.
I am fearful that I will go back to buffering in the future. I get anxious when I am bored and tend to over drink or over eat then. I have always pushed myself in school, starting my business, working out, etc that there wasn’t a lot of down time. So now when I have free time I panic. I am slowly finding out what I like to do when I have free time that isn’t just over drinking to check out. Sounds weird to say that I don’t know what I like to do for fun at 34 but its true.
Do you buffer? What feelings are you trying to escape from?